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Almost Paradise!

At the beginning of time God, in his infinite wisdom, turned to the Archangel Gabriel and said -

"Today I am going to create Scotland.  I will make it a country of dark beautiful mountains, purple glens and rich green forests.  I will give it clear swift flowing rivers and I will fill them with salmon.  The land shall be lush and fertile, on which the people shall grow barley to brew into an amber nectar that will be much sought after the world over.  Underneath the land I shall lay rich seams of coal.  In the waters around the shores there will be an abundance of fish and beneath the sea bed there will be vast deposits of oil and gas."

"Excuse me Sire" interrupted the Archangel Gabriel.  "Don't you think you are being a little overgenerous to these Scots?"

"Not really" replied the Lord.  "Wait until you see the neighbours I am giving them."

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