Caught a grasshopper today,
I’ll tell you about it if I may.
He was big, fat and yellow,
Quiet, not even a loud bellow.
Now come on little hopper with me
I’ll catch a fish, you’ll see.
Well, I’m telling you that guy,
Had another thought about being a fly.
He was chewing his chops so well,
From his mouth a chaw of tobacco juice fell.
How gross it was on my hand,
And I didn’t stop to ask what brand,
His tobacco happened to be,
Just threw him far away from me.