I am going to tell
you a story about a poor young widow woman, who lived in a house
called Kittlerumpit, though whereabouts in Scotland the house of
Kittlerumpit stood nobody knows.
Some folk think that it stood in the neighbourhood of the Debateable
Land, which, as all the world knows, was on the Borders, where the
old Border Reivers were constantly coming and going; the Scotch
stealing from the English, and the English from the Scotch. Be that
as it may, the widowed Mistress of Kittlerumpit was sorely to be
For she had lost her husband, and no one quite knew what had become
of him. He had gone to a fair one day, and had never come back
again, and although everybody believed that he was dead, no one knew
how he died.
Some people said that he had been persuaded to enlist, and had been
killed in the wars; others, that he had been taken away to serve as
a sailor by the press-gang, and had been drowned at sea.
At any rate, his poor young wife was sorely to be pitied, for she
was left with a little baby-boy to bring up, and, as times were bad,
she had not much to live on.
But she loved her baby dearly, and worked all day amongst her cows,
and pigs, and hens, in order to earn enough money to buy food and
clothes for both herself and him.
Now, on the morning of which I am speaking, she rose very early and
went out to feed her pigs, for rent-day was coming on, and she
intended to take one of them, a great, big, fat creature, to the
market that very day, as she thought that the price that it would
fetch would go a long way towards paying her rent.
And because she thought so, her heart was light, and she hummed a
little song to herself as she crossed the yard with her bucket on
one arm and her baby-boy on the other.
But the song was quickly changed into a cry of despair when she
reached the pig-stye, for there lay her cherished pig on its back,
with its legs in the air and its eyes shut, just as if it were going
to breathe its last breath.
“What shall I do? What shall I do?” cried the poor woman, sitting
down on a big stone and clasping her boy to her breast, heedless of
the fact that she had dropped her bucket, and that the pig-meat was
running out, and that the hens were eating it.
“First I lost my husband, and now I am going to lose my finest pig.
The pig that I hoped would fetch a deal of money."
Now I must explain to you that the house of Kittlerumpit stood on a
hillside, with a great fir wood behind it, and the ground sloping
down steeply in front.
And as the poor young thing, after having a good cry to herself, was
drying her eyes, she chanced to look down the hill, and who should
she see coming up it but an Old Woman, who looked like a lady born.
She was dressed all in green, with a white apron, and she wore a
black velvet hood on her head, and a steeple-crowned beaver hat over
that, something like those, as I have heard tell, that the women
wear in Wales. She walked very slowly, leaning on a long staff, and
she gave a bit hirple now and then, as if she were lame.
As she drew near, the young widow felt it was becoming to rise and
curtsey to the Gentlewoman, for such she saw her to be.
“Madam," she said, with a sob in her voice, "I bid you welcome to
the house of Kittlerumpit, although you find its Mistress one of the
most unfortunate women in the world."
“Hout-tout," answered the old Lady, in such a harsh voice that the
young woman started, and grasped her baby tighter in her arms. “Ye
have little need to say that. Ye have lost your husband, I grant ye,
but there were waur losses at Shirra-Muir. And now your pig is like
to die—I could, maybe, remedy that. But I must first hear how much
ye wad gie me if I cured him.”
“Anything that your Ladyship’s Madam likes to ask,” replied the
widow, too much delighted at having the animal’s life saved to think
that she was making rather a rash promise.
“Very good,” said the old Dame, and without wasting any more words
she walked straight into the pig-sty.
She stood and looked at the dying creature for some minutes, rocking
to and fro and muttering to herself in words which the widow could
not understand; at least, she could only understand four of them,
and they sounded something like this:
Then she put her hand into her pocket and drew out a tiny bottle
with a liquid that looked like oil in it. She took the cork out, and
dropped one of her long lady-like fingers into it; then she touched
the pig on the snout and on his ears, and on the tip of his curly
No sooner had she done so than up the beast jumped, and, with a
grunt of contentment, ran off to its trough to look for its
A joyful woman was the Mistress of Kittlerumpit when she saw it do
this, for she felt that her rent was safe; and in her relief and
gratitude she would have kissed the hem of the strange ^Lady’s green
gown, if she would have allowed it, but she would not.
“No, no,” said she, and her voice sounded harsher than ever. “Let us
have no fine meanderings, but let us stick to our bargain. I have
done my part, and mended the pig; now ye must do yours, and give me
what I like to ask — your son.”
Then the poor widow gave a piteous cry, for she knew now what she
had not guessed before—that the Green-clad Lady was a Fairy, and a
Wicked Fairy too, else had she not asked such a terrible thing.
It was too late now, however, to pray, and beseech, and beg for
mercy; the Fairy stood her ground, hard and cruel.
“Ye promised me what I liked to ask, and I have asked your son; and
your son I will have,” she replied, “so it is useless making such a
din about it. But one thing I may tell you, for I know well that the
knowledge will not help you. By the laws of Fairy-land, I cannot
take the bairn till the third day after this, and if by that time
you have found out my name I cannot take him even then. But ye will
not be able to find it out, of that I am certain. So I will call
back for the boy in three days.”
And with that she disappeared round the back of the pig-sty, and the
poor mother fell down in a dead faint beside the stone.
All that day, and all the next, she did nothing but sit in her
kitchen and cry, and hug her baby tighter in her arms; but on the
day before that on which the Fairy said that she was coming back,
she felt as if she must get a little breath of fresh air, so she
went for a walk in the fir wood behind the house.
Now in this fir wood there was an old quarry hole, in the bottom of
which was a bonnie spring well, the water of which was always sweet
and pure. The young widow was walking near this quarry hole, when;
to her astonishment, she heard the whirr of a spinning-wheel and the
sound of a voice lilting a song. At first she could not think where
the sound came from; then, remembering the quarry, she laid down her
child at a tree root, and crept noiselessly through the bushes on
her hands and knees to the edge of the hole and peeped over.
She could hardly believe her eyes! For there, far below her, at the
bottom of the quarry, beside the spring well, sat the cruel Fairy,
dressed in her green frock and tall felt hat, spinning away as fast
as she could at a tiny spinning-wheel.
And what should she be singing but—
“Little kens our guid dame at hame, Whippety-Stourie is my name.”
The widow woman almost cried aloud for joy, for now she had learned
the Fairy’s secret, and her child was safe. But she dare not, in
case the wicked old Dame heard her and threw some other spell over
So she crept softly back to the place where she had left her child;
then, catching him up in her arms, she ran through the wood to her
house, laughing, and singing, and tossing him in the air in such a
state of delight that, if anyone had met her, they would have been
in danger of thinking that she was mad.
Now this young woman had been a merry-hearted maiden, and would have
been merry-hearted still, if, since her marriage, she had not had so
much trouble that it had made her grow old and sober-minded before
her time; and she began to think what fun it would be to tease the
Fairy for a few minutes before she let her know that she had found
out her name.
So next day, at the appointed time, she went out with her boy in her
arms, and seated herself on the big stone where she had sat before;
and when she saw the old Dame coming up the hill, she crumpled up
her nice clean cap, and screwed up her face, and pretended to be in
great distress and to be crying bitterly.
The Fairy took no notice of this, however, but came close up to her,
and said, in her harsh, merciless voice, “Goodwife of Kittlerumpit,
ye ken the reason of my coming; give me the bairn."
Then the young mother pretended to be in sorer distress than ever,
and fell on her knees before the wicked old woman and begged for
“Oh, sweet Madam Mistress," she cried, “spare me my bairn, and take,
an' thou wilt, the pig instead."
“We have no need of bacon where I come from," answered the Fairy
coldly; “so give me the laddie and let me begone—I have no time to
waste in this wise."
“Oh, dear Lady mine," pleaded the Goodwife, “if thou wilt not have
the pig, wilt thou not spare my poor bairn and take me myself?"
The Fairy stepped back a little, as if in astonishment. “Art thou
mad, woman," she cried contemptuously, “that thou proposest such a
thing? Who in all the world would care to take a plain-looking,
red-eyed, dowdy wife like thee with them?"
Now the young Mistress of Kittlerumpit knew that she was no beauty,
and the knowledge had never vexed her; but something in the Fairy's
tone made her feel so angry that she could contain herself no
“In troth, fair Madam, I might have had the wit to know that the
like of me is not fit to tie the shoe-string of the High and Mighty
If there had been a charge of gunpowder buried in the ground, and if
it had suddenly exploded beneath her feet, the Wicked Fairy could
not have jumped higher into the air.
And when she came down again she simply turned round and ran down
the brae, shrieking with rage and disappointment, for all the world,
as an old book says, “like an owl chased by witches."