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Oliver Brown
Monarchy & Honours


Henry VIII to his generals: "Put all to fire and sword. Burn Edinburgh Town so used and defaced that, when you have gotten what you care of it, it may remain for ever a perpetual memory of the vengeance of God, lightened upon it for their falsehood and dishonesty."

From a letter from "Good Queen Bess" to her successor, James VI; "She never had thought to put the Queene, your mother, to death."

From James VI to "Good Queen Bess"; "Ye purge youre self on one unhappy fact".

Upon the lies of those two hypocrites the UK is based!

The Good Queen was the daughter of Good King Hal.


When King James VI went to England he changed his number to "I" in order to become a British monarch. When Edward I of Britain came to the throne he was called "Edward the Seventh", which is purely an English title. This was equivalent to an English UDU restoring the English monarchy which had ceased to exist in 1603. Try to get a Unionist to argue himself out of that one. You will have an amusing time.


Of course, everyone in Scotland is in favour of the United Kingdom. All the papers say so. But who is the wee fellow who at Hamden drowns the band heroically playing God to save its Queen by such a volume of jeering?


I remember the letter of an indignant Englishman who complained that he had stood for the National Anthem and found himself locked in a Glasgow cinema.


The most corrupting factor in politics is not money or ambition but vanity. That is why the present "Honours" system is so pernicious. The English have discovered that the easiest way to break a Scotsman’s spine is to slap him heartily on the back!

If we are going to keep these titles let us make them more accurate. For example, "the ignoble duke of- ", "the most dishonourable Mrs -", "Her Royal Lowness", would as titles indicate that the positive has also a negative which may prove a more accurate description.


When the Labour government were spending fantastic (and never revealed) sums to recover the Stone for the English some detectives arrived at the home of a Scot whose empty bottle lay at his side.

They woke him with difficulty and asked; "Do you know where the Stone is?"

"What stone?"
"The Coronation Stone."
"What do you want to know about it?"
"Do you know who pinched it?"
"Yes."
"Will you tell us?"
"Tell you what?"
"Who pinched it."
"Yes."

The detectives came eagerly around him.

"Who was it?"
"Edward the First"

Finally the detectives - very shamefacedly for they were Scots said; "We are only doing our duty," and received the reply: "You are not! You are doing what you are paid for!"


When Napoleon died at St. Helena, the Prime Minister said: "Your Majesty, your greatest enemy on earth is dead." To which the majestic and gracious King replied: "Is she, by God!"


The only thing the Labour Government has organised well was the Prince of Wales’s installation, at which he swore homage to his mother. It was highly successful. The Prince has not been imprisoned by his brothers in the Tower of London nor has he raised an army in the north to maintain his preference for a white or a red rose.