An English doctor, being shown around a
Scottish hospital, is taken into a ward with a number of patients who show
no visible signs of injury.
He goes to examine the first man he sees, and the man proclaims" "Fair fa'
yer sonsie face, Great chieftain e' the puddin' race!" The Englishman,
somewhat taken aback, goes to the next patient, who immediately launches
into: "Some hae meat, and canna eat, and some wad eat that want it, But we
hae meat and we can eat, and sae the Lord be thankit."
The next patient sits up and declaims: "Wee sleekit cow'rin tim'rous
beastie, O what a panic's in thy breastie! Thou need na start awa sae
hasty, wi' bickering brattle. I wad be laith to run and chase thee, wi'
Well, says the Englishman to his Scottish colleague. "I see you saved the
psychiatric ward for last."
"Nay, nay," the Scottish doctor corrects him. "this is the Serious Burns
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