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Jim Campbell
The Wedding


AACH IT’S OWER WILD, FIN WE HAUL THIS TIME WE’LL AWA INTAE ARINAGOUR, SAID THE SKIPPER. A SIGH O’ RELIEF AND THANK GOD FOR THAT CAM’ FAE THE CREW, MAYBE WE’LL GIT A DECENT NICHTS SLEEP IN A STEADY BED THE NICHT.

EFTER HAULIN’ THE GEAR THEY MADE THEIR WYE UP THE LOCH, GUTTIN’ THE CATCH ON THE WYE. AT LAST THEY GOT MOORED UP AND ALMOST IMMEDIATELY THE VILLAGERS CAME DOON ONTAE THE PIER. IT WIS COMMON PRACTICE THEN TAE PIT TWA OR THREE BOXES O’ FISH ONTAE THE PIER FOR THE LOCALS TAE HELP THEMSELVES AS THEY QUIDNA GIT FRESH FISH THAT OFTEN. NAE MATTER FIT YE SAID THEY WIDNA TAK ONYTHING FOR NITHING SO THEY AYE WID LEAVE FRESH EGGS OR HAME MADE SCONES IN RETURN.

THE FAMILY THAT RAN THE POST OFFICE CAM DOON TAE SEE THE SKIPPER, THEY HAD BEEN FREENS FOR MONY A YEAR AND INVITED HIM UP FOR HIS TEA AND A YARN. ACCEPTIN’ THERE OFFER HE WID BE GLED TAE GET OFF O’ THE BOAT FOR A WHILE BUT HE WIS GYE WORRIED FIN THEY TELT HIM THAT THERE WIS A WEDDING DANCE ON THAT NICHT AND THAT A’ THE CREW WERE INVITED.

ON HEARIN’ THE NEWS THE CREW’S EEN LICHTED UP. “ARICHT YE CAN GO BIT YOU HAD BETTER BEHAVE YERSELS BECAUSE WE ARE DEFINATELY GAUN OOT THE MORN. HE WIS NEAR KNOCKIT OWER IN THE RUSH O’ LADS GAUN TAE GIT READY FOR THE DANCE, A’ THOCHTS O’ A STEADY BED GAUN FLEEIN OOT THE WINDAE. LIKE MAIST FISHERMEN THERE WISNA MUCH DANCERS AMONGST THEM, BUT THAT WIS FURTHEST FAE THEIR MINDS, GITTEN TAE THE HOTEL FOR A LIVENER WIS THEIR PRIORITY.

EFTER A FEW REFRESHMENTS IN THE HOTEL THEY MADE THEIR WYE TAE THE VILLAGE HALL.

THE PROCEEDINGS WERE JIST STARTIN’ UP AS COUPLES WENT BURLIN ROON THE FLOOR TAE AN EIGHTSOME REEL AS THE LADS NOO FULL O’ DUTCH COURAGE MADE THEIR ENTRANCE. FIN THE DANCE FEENISHED THE M.C. WENT UP TAE THE MIKE TAE MAK AN ANNOUNCEMENT. “WE’VE GOT A BIT O’ A PROBLEM HERE CAN ONYBODY HELP OOT, THERE’S A BARREL O’ BEER HERE BUT NAEBODY HERE KENS HOO TAE TAP IT. IMMEDIATELY A SHOUT GOT UP FAE THE BACK O’ THE HALL, “I’VE BEEN DEEIN NITHING ELSE A’ MY DAYS” AND FORWARD STEPPIT WILLIE FA HAD BEEN A BOAT BUILDER AFORE GAUN TAE THE FISHIN’. TAE THE SOUNDS OF APPLAUSE AND CHEERS WILLIE PROCEEDED TAE TAP THE BARREL, AND A DELIGHTED M.C. FILLED UP A HALF GALLON TANKARD TAE HIM FOR HIS EFFORTS. AS THE NICHT WORE ON WILLIE SPOTTED SOMETHIN’ GOIN’ ON THAT WIS RICHT UP HIS STREET. THE WEEMIN WERE GOIN’ ROON THE HALL WI’ TRAYS O’ SCOTIAS FINEST, HE SEEN TWIGGIT ON AND IVERY TIME THE WIFIE PASSED HIM EFTER GEEIN HIM A DRAM HE WID GRAB A LOCAL QUINE, GI’E HER A BIRL ROON THE FLOOR AND FEENISH UP AT THE ITHER SIDE O’ THE HALL JIST IN TIME FOR THE WIFIE ARRIVIN’ THERE SO DOON GIED ANITHER ANE.! EVENTUALLY SOMEBODY MINDED ABOOT THE SKIPPER’S WARNIN’ SO THEY MADE THEIR WYE BACK TAE THE BOAT FULL O’ THE JOYS AND ITHER STUFF AS WEEL. SUDDENLY THEY HEARD CRIES O’ HELP! COMIN’ FAE THE SIDE OF THE ROAD. INVESTIGATIN’ THEY FOUND WILLIE LYIN’ IN THE DITCH LEGLESS. HUMPHIN HIM UP ATWEEN THEM THEY GOT HIM BACK ABOORD AND INTAE HIS BUNK.

IT JIST SEEMED LIKE MEENITS FIN THE CLATTER O’ THE ALARM GAUN OFF BROKE INTAE THEIR FUZZY MINDS. “RIGHT LADS START UP THE ENGINE”, CRIED THE SKIPPER AS THEY TUMMELED OOT O’ THEIR BUNKS BLEARIE EYED. IT WIS FREEZIN’ CAUL AND A GALE O’ WIND BLOWIN’ BUT THEY HIDNA FAR TAE GO AND WID BE RICHT IN ALOE THE LAND. EFTER THEY GOT THE GEAR SHOT IT REALLY STARTED BLOWIN’ WI’ HEAVY SHOORS O’ SNOW AND HAILSTANES. EVENTUALLY THE NET CAM’ UP AND THE STARTED TAE HAUL, AS THEY ERE HAULIN’ THE NET WILLIE TURNED TAE DODO AND SAID “THERE’S SOMETHIN’ NAE RICHT HERE”. LOOKIN’ ROON THERE WIS WILLIE IN HIS LONG WISSET DRAWERS AND SEMMIT HAULIN’ THE NET.

THE SKIPPER LOOKIT OOT THE WINDAE AT HIM IN DESPAIR, SHOOK HIS HEAD.AND TELT THEM TAE STOW THE GEAR AS THEY WERE GAUN AWA BACK IN, AND GET WILLIE AWA TAE HIS BED AFORE HE CATCHES PNEUMONIA. BACK IN AT THE PIER AND TIED UP OOR BOLD HERO MADE A REMARKABLE RECOVERY FIN HE HEARD THAT THE FESTIVITIES WERE STILL GOIN’ ON. HE WIS LAST SEEN GAUN LIK’ A SCALDED CAT UP TAE THE HOTEL HAULIN HIS GALLUSES OWER HIS SHOOTHERS.



 


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