“Keep it down in there,”
shouted the police officer from the doorway before turning to finish his
“Now,” whispered Gobban.
“Are you sure this will
work?” Alpin eyed the drunken man’s ears as the other leprechauns spit on
the man’s head.
“Of course it will. Have any
of my plans failed yet?” Gobban smeared his spittle throughout the man’s
hair, making the strands nice and slippery.
The man slapped at several
leprechauns before drunkenly saying, “Quit…it. Stop it.”
Gobban and King Rogan ignored
the man’s pleas and shoved his head toward the now widened bars that the
leprechauns had pulled apart a few minutes before.
“Stop! My head won’t fit,”
cried the man.
“Sure it will,” said Gobban.
“I have faith in my plan.” With much grunting and shouting, the man’s head
slipped through the bars.
Donal, the youngest of the
leprechauns, yelled for the guard, making sure his voice was heard by the
A moment later, the door
slammed against the wall. “Now what do you want,” said one of the policemen.
The slurred words of the
drunk said, “The leprechauns…they…spit on me. Got stuck in…the bars.
The officer gasped. “What
the-?” He grabbed the keys from his belt and opened the cell door.
Gobban and Alpin yanked the
door from the officer’s hands and pulled him further into the cell by his
pant leg. Donal kicked the officer’s rear end, shoving him against the far
wall. While the officer tried to regain his balance, King Rogan led the
leprechauns from the cell. Alpin was the last to leave and shut the cell
door behind him, with the drunken man’s head still wedged between the bars.
He then shoved the stolen officer’s keys into the cell door and locked the
two men inside.
King Rogan slipped out from
behind one of the now empty desks and wiggled next to Gobban who hid under a
chair. “What’ll we do now?”
“Give me a minute.” Gobban
eyed the other officers who worked at their desks, before glancing at the
door. “We need a distraction.” Muffled shouts coming from the cell drew the
other officer’s attention, who left the room to investigate. After the men
left the area, Gobban waved at the other leprechauns to follow his lead.
King Rogan mumbled as they
crept from the building, “Couldn’t have planned it better if I tried.”
Gobban shook his head, but kept his mouth shut.
A lone patrol car was parked
in the far corner of the lot. Gobban led the way as they scrambled toward
the vehicle and fumbled around in their pockets. Alpin strolled behind,
whistling an Irish tune while swinging the keys on his finger.
Shouting came from the front
door of the police station as the officers rushed outside to capture the
“Give me those key,” said
Gobban, who then opened the car door to let the other leprechauns inside.
The policemen banged their
nightsticks on the hood of the car.
“Hurry!” King Rogan shouted
“I can’t reach the pedals.”
“Must I do everything?” King
Rogan pointed at Donal. “You there. Get down on the floor and start pressing
on those things.”
“Much obliged Your Highness.”
Donal hunkered below the dashboard and pressed on one of the pedals.
“Not that one you dolt,”
shouted Gobban. “Try the long one…on the right side.”
The police car lurched
forward, forcing the policemen to move aside.
Gobban adjusted the side
mirror as he steered onto the road. No police cars followed in pursuit, no
flashing blue lights, no wailing sirens, nothing.
“Ah ha! We seem to have
escaped.” Just then, Gobban noticed Alpin’s smiling face appear in the
rearview mirror. “What’re you grinning about?”
Alpin chuckled. “While you
were all scrambling about, I let the air out of their tires.”
“That’s a stroke of genius,”
said King Rogan. “I should promote you as my man-at-arms.” He leaned over to
say to Gobban. “You could learn a few things from him.”
Gobban kept his mouth shut,
all the while, gnashing his teeth together.
“How long till we arrive?”
Donal peeked above the edge of the seat. “It’s a bit cramped down here and I
can’t see at all.”
“How would Gobban know,” said
King Rogan. “You should be addressing that question to your king.”
Donal sighed. “How long Your
“Give or take awhile,” said
“Thank you for sharing your
most profound insight, Your Highness.” Donal ducked back under the seat, out
of King Rogan’s vision.
“I’m glad to offer.”
As Gobban drove the car
closer to his destination, he turned off the lights and told Donal to give
less gas to the car. The police car crept down the dark street before Gobban
parked it several houses away from the McWallace residence.
“What do we do now?” Donal
climbed out from beneath the floor.
“We wait,” said Gobban.
Donal whispered, “For what?”
Alpin smacked the back of
Donal’s head. “For all the lights to go out in the house. We can’t go
sneaking inside if they’re all awake. It wouldn’t be called sneaking then,
would it.” Alpin rolled his eyes..
Silence filled the car,
minutes ticked past, eventually turning into hours. Bugs landed on the
windshield, flying away a few minutes later. There the leprechauns waited
for the lone light in the living room to shut off.
Kate called Alasdair’s cell
phone from within the taxi cab. “I’m about to go into the house. Yes it’s
dark. It looks like only the television and one of the living room lights is
on, but the rest of the lights are off.”
“I’ll be home shortly. There
was a problem with some of the accounting books. We’re finishing up.”
Alasdair’s weary voice whispered through the other end of the cell phone.
“Want me to heat a kettle of
tea?” Kate paused when she spied movement coming from the bushes in front of
the house. “I don’t believe this,” she cried into the phone.
“What?” Alasdair’s voice cut
into her tirade.
“Your daft mum must be having
a party of some kind because a gaggle of leprechauns are going into the
house.” Kate sneered. “She didn’t even ask me permission to have more
Alasdair sighed. “You know
how friendly she is. She hates the thought of guests staying at a hotel
instead of her house.”
A low growl erupted from deep
within Kate’s throat. “But it’s not her house…it’s mine!”
“Now dear, she’s only here
for a short stay and she’s getting on in years. Why don’t you go in and tell
her we don’t have the room,” said Alasdair.
“What? She’s your mother. You
handle it,” shrieked Kate. “She’ll just give me a guilt trip and tell me
this is all somehow my fault and until you fix everything, I’m staying at
the hotel.” She slammed the phone shut before hearing Alasdair call out that
he’d see her there. “Take me back to the hotel,” said Kate to the taxi
“Sure thing ma’am.” The cab
pulled away from the curb with a snarling Kate in the backseat, cursing her
Grams shoved a ball of yarn
into the bag at her feet. She then stuffed the almost finished sweater and
knitting needles inside. A moment later, she turned off the lamp on the end
table next to her chair, before spreading a blanket around her legs. The
muffled voices that came from the television were the only sound in the
living room. Grams’ eyelids began to droop and her head lolled to the side.
Flickers of light flashed throughout the room, casting leprechaun shadows
along the ceiling, but Grams never noticed since she was fast asleep in her
chair. A small chubby hand slid across her mouth to muffle the startled cry
that burst from her lips. King Rogan grabbed the blanket from Grams’ legs
and tossed it over her head. Afterwards, the leprechauns held her wiggling
body and carried her back to the police car while Gobban scribbled a quick
note and left it on the now empty chair. Alpin blocked Gobban’s path.
“It ain’t right. She didn’t
do anything to us. She’s always been a friend to the wee folk.”
Gobban shoved Alpin through
the hallway. “I know, but what can we do? We’re the ones who elected him as
our king and now we have to obey him.”
Alpin choked on his next
comment. “Even though he’s a complete idiot?”
“Yes,” said Gobban. “Now keep
quiet before we wake her family.”
The television continued to
flicker in the now empty living room long after the leprechauns kidnapped
Grams from the house.