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The Loch Ness Monster Has His Say!

Lyrics composed by John Henderson

A parody, (with apologies to WD Cocker),
learned at my mother's knee in Banknock in 1947]

A monster, gosh, is't not a scunner
The way it's made a nine day wonder?

Monster, indeed! Folks glare while searching,
And think I might be worth the fetching
But though much bigger than I wish,
Leave me alone, I'm just a fish.
I have a head, I have a tail;
So has a haddock or a whale
A queer-like shape, a tail o'er long.
Yet, dash it all! I've done no wrong!
So let me splash and paddle on,
There'll still be wonders when I'm gone;
But I suspect you yet may find
The worst of monsters midst mankind.

Return to John's Poetry Page


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