[Many dialects spoken]

Wirds screeved bi John Henderson oan the 13th of April, 2015

Scots' sangs fae the Norlans, wi thur canty tunes,
An mony doric wirdies, screev'd fur quines an loons;
Thase fair 'teuk the biscuit', as maist fowks did gree ...
....Tho' a fyow fae Ingland, aft said, "Dearie-me .....
What a curious language, and such clumsy tunes;
They're just like Scottish wild wolves howling to their moons;
They must learn our English, then read and write no Scots;
And our Whitehall-MPs' actions will soon brain-wash their tots."

Sae seen cam it efter, thit ilka lad an lass
Gat edicated in Inglish mair or less 'en masse';
Hooivver bein mony-leidit, faar mony Scots hiv geen
Tae kwintries a' the wirld-ow'r, aye they hiv caa'd the teen!