Lyrics composed by John Henderson on
Friday the 2nd of April, 2010 to a typical piece of George Formby
doggerel song music.
Ye'd ne'er caa Jim
handsome, tho' a loon fa kens he's smert, An the quines roon toon say his trig-kilt
gars a kittlin in ilk's hert; Noo I ken a lot o' billies in lang breeks
fa'r ne'er ow'r plees'd Seein sae mony'a 'Protty Polly' droolin
ow'r Jim's knees !
Noo gif laddies like
us hud ony nouse, We'd pit oor thocht-caps oan; Quines seem tae fancy kilty Jim As jist the maist
exterordnar fella thit did ivver shaw limb; Yit Jim seems nae catch tae us loons
Wi nae gowd in
his sporran tae coff jos goons; Noo gif lassies like them, wint chiels
like Jim, Yon's
an affa tae-dae ! Och ay ! It's a scunner I'd say !
I'm yin o' thase dool billies fa wi lassies his nae lick; E'en wi breeks or kilt an sporran fu,
things nivver seem tae click; I aft think oan fit I dae wrang, an fit
I've gat tae dee, Tae hiv yin sich 'Protty Polly' ow'r the
mune 'boot me !
Bit the wirld it is nae a freenly plank,
Fan jos are fit
I seek; Quines
aa aye seem tae ging-fur fit Are jist the maist exterordnar noshuns
whilk I micht ne'er git; Shair yon Jim seems nae catch tae me, Wi naithin in his sporran bit a
Sae, gif lassies like thase, wint chiels like Jim, I shair dinna ken why ! Och weel ! I micht nivver ken why !
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