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How to Keep Up with the Joneses  
by Donna Jones Flood

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"How To Keep Up With The Joneses" December 1, 2004
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Once There Was a Princess

Youth and passion prevailed. A lonely girl, Favia, found a mate from the ranks of the pagans and then her marriage was like a balancing act on a see-saw. The heaviest one was closest to the middle and the lighter out a distance away from the center. Her ideals of ancient ways had to be wrapped around her like gold leaf, carefully. Songs of the pagans who knew her husband poked fun at her. Melodies of her own kind were made with distrust because she wasn’t true to her own. And yet, there was this princess from among her people, who only looked on with a smile, neither in judgement nor criticism. The girl relaxed and felt strengthened because of the regal insight of this woman who had aristocratic refinement and exerted no forcefulness or pressure.

Favia became a woman with all the battles there as things do go for her gender. Once she watched, while her family was threatened to be taken away because of an early threat from disease and death. There was no one who had a shoulder for her tears but the one who had been a princess was now a queen and the tender greetings still reached out and blessed the young Favia with the strength of her mellow wisdom. Others often had a looking down their nose attitude. The queen said nothing, other than to greet her with love and warmth while calling her name. The smile of royalty spreads warmth to those who are cursed with weights upon their life. How little effort was expended, yet how healing the show of approval. It seemed to Favia only the queen knew about the characteristic of dedication.

As the queen aged and was at a place of physical weakness never once did she waver or fail to lose this sense of duty for her people, those who were around her. The aging woman’s steps were halting and slow and she found it necessary to hold to something to keep her balance. More than ever there was a glow of a smile to light her face when Favia respectfully stepped up to her.

“Favia!” She would exclaim with an honestly joyful expression on her face, “How ARE you?” And that was all. No worries about anyone, anything or whatever else. Nothing of a holier than thou attitude for criticism ever crossed her countenance. Left only was the look of pure pleasure in the elder woman’s eyes to simply greet and rejoice in a small happy moment. These are the ties to hold. This alone must remain a mental picture of encouragement in Favia’s mind for all time. Frail and fragile, the aged woman rested in her private living quarters after she had held court that one last time and ever so lightly from her hand slipped the glass of milk she held. The regal lady quietly and softly as a lover’s whisper, fell asleep in death. Easily, this gentle person, in a true queenly manner, faced her last enemy with that same strength she had while living.

Genealogy Library, June 2005

    After nineteen years, finally I'm closing in on having my genealogy library in place. First there was the research on the antique photographs.

    We  started this, my husband Rodney Flood and me,  before I had a computer. Typing on a typewriter with white out in hand was no fun. A paragraph in error on a page with wrong dates, place of birth or ancestral lineage could make a whole page need to be retyped. Traveling from courthouse to courthouse was a pleasure but definitely expensive. Dusty old files,  in a basement wasn't much fun either. Then there was the old house converted into a museum that was without a doubt, haunted. That wasn't fun even if a person has no fear and is determined to find a certain bit of history on one family line or another.  Once a large purse thrown across the room, another time a hologram of a man in a World War 11 uniform strolling about the grounds, and then the last time visited a stench in the room where the files were was unbelievable. When this was reported to the curator and she came to investigate the odor was totally gone. This was the last visit there. Takes a bit to get through to me but I finally can be convinced we were not welcome.

     All I needed was a place to put my library. I went through all the in's and out's of trying to establish the old ranch home as a library. The weather is very cold out on the prairie in the winter but that was all right in my mind since we wouldn't be using it but only in the summer tourists months. The ranch house was well built and able to be very comfortably cool even in hot August days. At night it was necessary to “pull covers, it could be so cool.

     “Sister's lost her mind.”  Not to my face were these comments made but I was well aware what was being said. “She wants to restore that old ranch house for a genealogy library. Why that is next to being insane.”

      On and on it went, not only from every family member but for any and everyone in the community as well. Why I let things like this touch my aching heart I cannot tell you, but it did. Finally, like the haunted museum,  I turned away from the dear old home I loved as a child.

      My next thought was to go to my front patio which is partially covered anyway. I felt it would be an easy matter to finish it up as a room. However, every possible other project was a must-do on the property. With one more summer tourist season going past I began to feel hopelessly defeated.

      This was when some folks came to my home searching for material on a family member they never knew. The woman had been adopted at an early age. Her biological father had been  Jones but she knew little about him.  I was a little embarrassed that I had to seat them at the kitchen table. However, this was a good way to spur me on to finish my project.

     My idea is to have the antique photographs on DVD's with the information narrated so a person can see the picture, and hear the information. I was made aware of this need from the hours of having to strain  my eyes looking at rolls of microfilm. Libraries with genealogy information have many people coming through so this is necessary but here in my own home there will not be that happening so individuals will have the opportunity to do something like this. This room has a door so people can be shut off from the activities of the family in the rest of the house. This way they can study in peace, undisturbed. The lovely patio with all the greenery and water fountain lends a private, pleasant surroundings also. Soft music Rodney has installed so it will be a quiet backdrop. This privacy will be guaranteed through the invitational status in regards to a visit. A phone call to firm up a time and hours for reservations will do.


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